Some months ago I broached the subject of "putting him down" to Bonnie. She had been thinking of it too, but not yet ready to say anything.

So, over the past few months we would bring up that subject from time to time.

Another change -- starting perhaps a year ago -- he began to lose control of his bowels at night -- and leave piles on the bedroom floor.  Earlier he was very good and never did such a thing.

Our bedroom floor is rather spotted.  A stranger, I'm sure, could never understand how we could put up with such!!

That was getting worse.

When Bonnie and I would talk about it openly I would say that it was her decision.  She has more of an affinity line with Chester than I do, particularly as he lies at her feet while she is doing her spiritual counseling (you may think of that as a special type of meditation learned in our Church of Scientology)  and spends all day at her feet when she is at her desk doing this personal counseling..

When Bonnie left for the advanced religious retreat of our Church ( called "Flag" and located in Clearwater, Florida), Chester would then come into my office -- to be close to me.

So, yesterday there were many piles on the floor -- that was Friday, September 20, 2002.

Bonnie is leaving for that Church Retreat for review counseling, on Monday, October 1, so we were now looking at the worry that Chester might actually die while Bonnie was away -- that would cause upset for her THERE, and she wouldn't be home to be close to him.

Also, Bonnie is scheduled to have dental work done this next Wednesday, with pain-killers, so she won't be able to do her personal counseling on top of the Novocain after that, until she arrives at Flag.  That meant that if we did decide to put Chester down before she left, there was very little time for that to happen and Bonnie to be able to address the event spiritually for Chester and herself.

So, yesterday, Friday, was a very difficult day.

We talked about it for some time and agreed that it had to be done -- to put Chester down, and that Saturday would have to be the day.  It is VERY different to talk about such a thing theoretically
but far different to select a day, hour and minute!  That was very final!

The photo on the left is our dog Raja.  He and Chester were good friends.

Here is a page with a story about Raja:  http://www.oralchelation.com/faq/rajah.htm

 

We made the arrangements at the vets on Friday.  It is a simple procedure. We walk in, Chester mobile, go into one of the treatment rooms. We can be with him as long as we wish. The doctor puts a catheter into Chester, somewhere, and then whenever we are ready, injects an overdose of an anesthetic into the catheter -- it takes about 10 second for  Chester to die, and is painless.

After we left the vets we were both crying -- first time we could each see that the other was crying.  We hid it before.

We then informed Maia and Kimberly, I wrote a note to my son Loren, and Bonnie went into her counseling session.

Bonnie has not had much success in "reaching" Chester during her earlier counseling or mental attempts.  She would describe him as "confused" and not much able to be in communication.

That session was about the same.

Both Bonnie and I were very sad yesterday, with Chester doing his normal thing.

I would say to Bonnie, several times, "Well, we can always change our minds!"

And, I was ready to clean up after Chester  a great deal with Bonnie gone to Flag.

Last evening I was down on the floor, giving Chester some special attention and love.  He hardly responds to petting any more.  But, I held him firmly and petted for some time.

I then got a "message" -- it is hard to describe to another what a "mental message" is like.

Mr. Hubbard defines a "theta perceptic" as like a hunch or guess.  It is something in the spiritual universe, like a "perception" but is not in the physical universe, it is in the "theta universe" -- the universe of spirituality and we call it a "theta perceptic."

So, if you have a "hunch" that something was said, perhaps it was. The biggest enemy of theta perceptics would be self-invalidation that it even happened.

I got this very clear and strong "message" from Chester -- that he agreed with our putting him down.

It was very clear, very strong.  I remarked about it to Bonnie.

Bonnie hasn't had such messages, yet, but I am sure she will.

I still had some doubts.

It was near bed time and we took Chester (and Raja) out for his "last night time walk."  Both Bonnie and I were crying.

Going up the hill on our walk I got another very strong, very clear, message.  It was actually one with some anger in it. The message from Chester was that, "You must have resolve in what you intend to do!"

Things began to change for me a great deal. Bonnie didn't get that message, but she had no doubt that it was real and that I got it.

Then I got more messages.

Including that some of the messing on the floor was to keep us convinced that he should be put down!  He had not the resolve or ability, himself, to end his life -- he needed help!

That walk ended, we in bed, Chester in his usual place on the couch.

Twice that night I got up to take first Raja, and then Raja and Chester, outside to pee.

Chester did pee, but nothing more about 3:30 AM.

I got up at 5 AM to go to the toilet and stepped in a small pile -- wet and runny, my bare feet, in the dark.  This happened years ago, but not for a long time have I actually stepped in a pile.  It is very disconcerting.  The first time it happened, years ago, I got very angry.

Last night, no anger.

So, I then turned on a light and found about 8 piles, big and small, spread over 20 feet, not fresh enough to be warm, but certainly all very messy.

No anger.

Chester was, by then, sleeping on the couch.

Bonnie got up and we spent some time cleaning things.

While I had been lying in bed, before I got up, I had some more clear and strong messages from Chester.

I shared those with Bonnie.

I realized that "Chester" is a spiritual being, and that he had been occupying the meat body of the dog.

In some taped lectures I'm currently listening to Mr. Hubbard talks about the size of the pre-frontal lobes of a dog -- very tiny compared to a human.  Mr. Hubbard would not say that the the spiritual entity is IN those lobes, but in this lecture he seems to say that a dog is very limited in his "exercise and use of spiritual abilities" by the small size of those lobes  So, I suppose, you can't expect to get very much communication with a "dog" who is very much in the body of the dog.

Mr. Hubbard also describes the "genetic entity" which is like a "decayed spiritual entity" that exists in the body, and can keep the body "alive" even if the being, himself, leaves.

I realized that "Chester" had become exterior to the dog body, and when he was exterior he no longer had any of the limitations of that pre-frontal lobe -- he was able to communicate with me with great clarity and strength.

The "quality" of the communication seemed limited to the "experience" he may have had for some time.  After all, who knows how many lifetimes he may have spent in a dog or animal body -- being limited by those prefrontal lobes as to what he could see and think about.

But, that was a very high level beingness for Chester and the messages were very clear.  He was thankful that we were going to help him get free of that body.

He was no longer in control of it.

He would say, "Well, it is NOT me who is making those messes on the floor, but that dog's body (with the GE) that is doing that!"

And, no shame or embarrassment.

Almost, "Well, if you had done this earlier, I would have been free earlier and you would have had less mess on your floor!"

So, it is 8:30 AM, now.  I take  Raja to the groomers in one hour. Bonnie now is about to do some spiritual counseling, with Chester at her feet. We will see what happens.

I come back from leaving Raja at the groomers, we take the dog body out for a "last walk."  Could be some more crying??  Then we both take "Chester" to the vets, 10:40 AM, and he gets his freedom.

I don't think I'll cry any more -- I feel very good, now, about all this.  Bonnie hasn't yet had those clear and strong messages, but she now understands that she may have been "looking" for them "from" the body of Chester.

We'll see.

If Chester is then willing to be guided, Bonnie can help him find a new body that we can guide him to.   Chester is now a spiritual entity, not a "dog" and is, for perhaps the first time in many years, now able to think and exist without the limitation of those tiny pre-frontal lobes.

The adventure continues.

This part is written after we have done the deed.

I honestly thought I wouldn't cry.  And I thought Chester would continue to stay exterior from his dog body, and be calm about it all.

But, as Chester heard more and more from me about what was soon to happen he realized that the great love that we had for one another was because both of us, as spiritual entities, were occupying meat bodies.  When you are in a meat body you tend to identify others by their bodies, rather than their spiritual characteristics.

I began to worry, and so did Chester, that without his body it would be harder to "feel" the emotions we had -- the love we had.

So, Chester dove back into the body, the dog body, wanting to stay close, close as he could, physically, to Bonnie and me.  As soon as he got back into that body, of course, he picked up all the pain and worry of death -- because to whatever extent a dying dog can "think" he is afraid of death.  Once the being is free of the body, there is, obviously, no more fear of death since the spiritual being never dies.

But, Chester dove back into the body and was now acting terrorized.

When we took him into the vets he was trembling.  He would shuffle back and forth between me and Bonnie, wanting closeness, but not getting much comfort from the intense petting we were giving.  He was in terror!

Then he started making howling noises, very small, like a whimper, close to a growl, but noises we had never heard from him before.  Unfortunately we had to wait almost an hour before the doctor could get to us.

Chester could not be comforted.

Had I not had the messages from him, the day before, I don't know how I could have gone ahead with putting him down.

But, I knew that he agreed it was the best thing to do, and Bonnie and I had come to that conclusion, ourselves. So, we knew we were going ahead.

Chester knew that, too, but was in terrible fear about this unknown event.  He was in fear, of course, ONLY because he was back inside the body and suffering all the emotions IT had.

I knew that the second the body was dead, Chester would be free, and no longer suffering in any way.

The actual event was so much more quick than we expected.

The vet explained that he gave the dog a very large overdose of an anesthesia -- that Chester, within a very few seconds, would get very sleepy, and start to relax.  He said that the dog would then die within seconds after that.  He warned us of some of the reflex actions that might occur -- none did.

Bonnie and I could not possibly restrain our tears -- we clutched one another as both of us stood by the table where Chester was -- holding him, petting him.

I had a vision, a scene, a thought, of a beautiful ocean and sunset scene, where Chester was free of the physical universe and enjoying the beauty, as was I.

It was all over.

Chester stopped breathing as we held him.

We cried.

We stood there for a few more minutes, and I asked Bonnie, "OK now?"

We left.

The vet had Chester lying on a blanket, and took the long end of the blanket to wrap up over him so only his head was showing. 

He certainly looked peaceful.

The vet had told us that his eyes would remain open, in death.  I didn't understand if they COULD be closed or not.  i tried to close his eyes -- they closed but then opened again.

Peaceful in death, happy in a new life!

It was both a sad and a happy moment for us.

We got out to the car, with Chester's empty collar going home with us as the last reminder.

It was only a few minutes after the death of that body that I got the first communication from Chester.

It was brilliant, bright, like a bubble in space.  He was very happy, and actually had not much to say about it all.

Then Bonnie also got into communication with him and urged him to follow us home where Bonnie would do some special spiritual counseling that would help him a great deal to become happy and stable in a new body if that is what he wishes.

Bonnie has done this for MY mother and for her own mother, following their "deaths."

We will have some continuing communication with Chester, I know, but soon, without the body as a via and to remind us, we will have lost touch with our loyal friend of 19 years.

Karl Loren

Almost 24 hours after Chester died I'll post these further thoughts and events on Sunday, September 22, 2002, at 6:22  AM in Burbank, California.

Bonnie and I have both had some extensive communications with Chester during the last 24 hours.  I'll leave most of those for private, but say only that I've made some mistakes in all this.

Bonnie and I went to a classical piano concert last night -- one that had been scheduled for several weeks.  It was my good friend Mario Fenniger, playing in a private home with only about 70 guests.  During the concert Chester came "near" and I invited him to enjoy the music.  Classical piano music is not much in his experience, so he didn't stay around.  It was during this brief exchange that I realized how different he was from the "dog" I had loved.

First, it is not all that easy to be analytical about this.  I know, analytically, that what I've written above is "true" but what I did not realize was how tenacious the aberrations of the physical universe are.  In the midst of my grief at "losing" Chester, then the joy at "finding" him, I have now realized with some certainty that what I thought I had lost was never there, in truth, because my grief was tied to the loss of a piece of meat that moved.  What I have found is a being who is not a "dog!"  "He" is a spiritual being without sex, but I'll still call "it" a "he."  He is so much better off now, and I am too.  He realizes that far better than I do just now!

So, some sadness continues! But the joy is greater, for a very good friend is free.!

KL

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