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I Want To Lose Weight!  Bad! Help!

Vibrant Life Testimonial

I often find myself giving advice when I don't think anyone will listen!

Well, I heard from Jim.  He is a loser, and will not change.  He will not respond further, I'm sure!

The above ends the story about Jim.  Here is another.

Alas! That is the burden of my life!  (Don't cry for me!)

So, the next below is an eMail similar to one I get often -- someone who gives me a basketful of health problems, including excess weight.

Perhaps it is my callous nature?  I "know" what the solution is, and I almost know with the same certainty that the person won't take my advice. But, I send the advice anyway, and sometimes write it this way:

It is fascinating to be in my chair -- getting many queries such as yours.

I sit here with absolute certainty of what will handle your problem.

Say, for a moment, that this certainty is 95%.

Some might even say that I have an arrogant confidence about this issue.

I have another certainty -- perhaps at 85%.  This second certainty is that you either won't believe it, or won't do it!!

Just considering those two estimates on my part, you see where it puts me -- should I even try to send this advice??

Before I tell you this magic bullet that can solve your health situation, let me tell you that I don't sell anything you will need to implement my suggestions.  So, I have no commercial interest in this.  I do have a friend's interest in your success.

Your solution is in diet.

Whether you have told me a lot or a little about your own diet, I can still be very sure that it needs improvement.

I do have lots of data to give you on diet, but no diet will work without a person's desire for change and willingness to follow some plan -- whatever the plan might be.

There ARE foolish plans, but the desire to change is far more important than what change is correct for you.  Just the plain desire for change.

I now give you my advice on how to approach this subject, diet or excess weight, or poor health caused by poor diet, on an intellectual plane.

Here is the sequence I think you have to go through.  If I wanted to drag this out I would give you just one of these at a time and invite you to respond, to send your "answer" to me for each one.  I would not send you the second item until I felt you had thoroughly handled the first one.

1.  Recognize that your excess weight is a ruin of your life.

What ruins a life?  Being fat, all by itself, MAY do that, but it may not.  ONLY you can decide what is ruining your life.  I invite you to write to me, to tell me about whatever it is that you think ruins your life.  Now, you can have many ruins, but I suggest that we limit this only to a ruin related to diet, poor health somehow related to diet, or overweight.

2.  Recognize what the effect on your life is -- this excess weight or poor health.

Write to me on this, also, preferably one of these at a time. Tell me what the "ruin" you have selected, above, causes in your life.  What are the effects of this "thing" you have described in number one above.

3.  Recognize that the situation could get worse!  (After all, if it COULD NOT get worse, then you wouldn't need to change -- you are living with the situation now.)

You should realize that if you answer these questions in a way that you think will satisfy or please ME, you have missed the point and it won't "work."  Whatever your situation may be, you could consider that it won't, or can't, get any worse.  Fair enough.  You would not go on with more questions if that is the case, but go back to #2, or even #1 and work more on that one.  But, if you can see that the effects you have described in #`2 COULD get worse, then make sure that is YOUR reality and write to me about that.

4.  Get the feeling that a change is needed.  Just some glimmer of an interest in change.

Write to me and convince me that you feel some need of change.  Make this easy on yourself -- at this point you don't have to start restricting calories, or going to the gym, but you must, at this level, recognize in yourself a need for change.

5.  Gradually build that glimmer up to a DEMAND for improvement -- this would be a improvement IN YOURSELF, of course.

We go now from a NEED to a DEMAND. We go from a CHANGE to an IMPROVEMENT. This is just a gradient increase in intensity of the previous step. This is the step where you strengthen your resolve.  Write to me and convince me that you are DEMANDING improvement in the situation.

6.  Decide that there is hope that you can actually change.

One can have a great desire for improvement, but may have had so many failures in the past that you have given up any hope that it is possible.  Without hope you will never progress further on this series of steps. Without hope for improvement you will not improve.  Somehow or another you have to recognize within yourself, some "HOPE" that you can improve.  Write to me and convince me that you have hope.

7.  Figure that you haven't done it yet, by yourself, and that help will be necessary.

Even when people have hope, they sometimes fail to notice that they have NOT handled this situation in the past.  So, it then becomes necessary to admit to yourself that if you could have done this all by yourself, you would have done it.  You have not!  Otherwise you would not be doing this exercise.  So, write to me and convince me that you believe that you need help on this matter.

8.  Get into communication with someone who offers help, be prepared to judge the value of the offered help.

Now here is a big step.  Once you feel that you need help you have to select someone (or something) to help you.  It is only YOU who can make this selection.  I am ready to help you on this, but are YOU ready for ME to be that help?  I'm not going to ask for or accept any money, no signed contracts, no unusual requirements.  You only have to read my stuff, write to me, tell me what's going on and read my replies.  I can help, but you have to be willing to receive help from me.  You can always drop out of this anytime, but I ask you to at least start by saying to yourself, "I want Karl Loren's help!"

 I invite you go go through these stages, even write to me about each one, separately.  Your friends who might be overweight?  They  must do this by themselves, for themselves.   You cannot do it for anyone.

When you have arrived at point 8, ONLY then do I start advising on this matter.

So, what do you say?

Karl Loren

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What prompted me to write such a reply to Jim?  HERE was his original eMail to me, dated October 15, 2003:

Dear Karl,

What can you recommend for weight loss and diabetes, along with the metal detoxification? I just buried my 54 year old father last month. Colon cancer went through him like a bullet train. I'm alot heavier and more inactive than my father ever was, and it finally hit me that I better do something quick before I suffer his same fate.


Thanks for your time,

Jim

---

So, Jim wrote back! Wow!  Here is what he said:

Well where should I start? I'm trapped in the friend zone with every female friend I have because of my weight.

The family history on my Dads side is full of hard arteries and heart problems, my moms side is full of cancer. My dad had quintuple bypass surgery on 9-11-01.

I've dabbled in stand up comedy, won awards for my talents in both tv and radio from the most respected broadcasting school in the midwest, and can't do anything with it because chics don't like fat guys.

So in a nutshell, I'm ready to do what ever you suggest. It's time to do something.

I'm 31 and I've been overweight all my life except for 12th grade wrestling season and the 1st year of college many moons ago. I'm your outbreak monkey, lets do this thing.

 

Thanks for your time,

Jim

---

Well, Jim,

Here is the magic bullet!

I can recall puzzling about front-load mutual funds. These are the type where some salesman takes five years worth of commissions out of the first payment you make into the mutual fund.  You "intend" to invest, say, $500 per month, or $6,000 per year. The salesman signs you up for a $30,000 "plan."  If you keep to the contract, over five years you would invest $30,000, and, per the past history of the fund you would have, say, $60,000 of assets.

He tells you, up front, that he will make a 10% commission on the $30,000 "sale" and that all of his commission is taken out during the first year!!

So, out of every $500 he sends in, monthly, he gets a commission check for $250.

At the end of the first year you have paid $6,000, but there is only $3,000 that got into YOUR fund.

Why do these things sell?

Partly because you are enthusiastic about doing this, at first, and are sure you will keep up the payments.  But, the industry knows that it is all too often that people say they will pay $500 per month, and after a couple months they quit. Why?  Their kid needed a pair of sneakers!

And, the salesman who worked so hard to convince you to start, might have gotten only 10% of each payment (his commission) and so he got a measly $100 from your two monthly payments.

So, the industry dreamed up the "front loaded" mutual fund.  You invest $500 the first month and the salesman gets $400 of that.  He gets almost all of your investment, each month, until HE has earned his total commission of $3,000.

Dumb!  Why would a poor sucker fall for this?

Because, the industry found, with this system the investor realized that unless he kept up his monthly investments he would lose a lot of money (the commissions pulled out early).  So, he gets to thinking that he'd better stay in the plan so he won't lose money.

Then, after a couple years, he has managed to make the payments every month, and not starve to death, and he probably has total assets nicely higher than his total payments.

That's the front-end mutual fund.

Jim, I am creating for you, the first time ever, the "front load diet program" where you "invest" a great deal at the start, and have a lot to lose if you don't keep going on the plan.

What do you have to lose?  Your reputation and self-worth.

I invite you to send me a photo -- it can be a good looking face.  Allow me to publish your name and eMail address on THIS page.  I also publish your goal (like "lose 100 pounds in 6 months" or whatever).  You would look awfully foolish to thousands (?) of people if we publish this about you and then you remain fat.

So, sure, you have something to lose -- right up front.  Your reputation and self-esteem.

Every piece of advice I give you will be HERE.  I will expect you to write me regularly about your experience with the diet -- and every message of yours will also be published HERE.

Won't that be wonderful when you DO IT!  Won't that be terrible if you DON'T???

There will be no charge for my personal interest in this and in you.  I don't sell any part of the diet I will suggest to you.  Oh, I do sell vitamins, and you can buy those if you wish, but the most important thing I can do for you is partly to give you good diet advice, and more importantly to figure out how to motivate you to DO THIS THING!

I'll give you a chance to "bail out" quick.  I want you to read at my diet suggestions.  They have been published for anyone to read, and there are thousands of pages to support the one main page I have HERE.

You can read that, get so scared that you never want to hear from me again??

Jim, I challenge you to regain your health without having to take any pills, just food, but eat the RIGHT food, not junk.

Are you up to it??

Karl Loren

 

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